Tuesday, November 16, 2010

I make dough, but don't call me "doughboy".

In case you were wondering what kind of stuff I'm up to when I'm alone in my classroom with a whole lot of coffee at 7:45am, here's an idea.

An Ode to Tuesday

You're premature, you're average.
The city uses you for garbage.
The most unimportant of days.
Too close to Monday, they say.
But me, I disagree.
I look forward to you all week.
Tuesday, you are Heaven.
I don't leave the house until 7:00.
I snooze for an hour
Cause I don't have to shower
(My hygiene is fine, don't worry.)
To school and a meeting
No kids I'll be greeting
(Until the bell rings at 9:03)
But the cherry on top, you're library day!
They come in, and I send them away!
45 minutes, class is halfway done.
Back to me with books, they come.
No simile, no metaphor, no "Stop hitting him in the head!"
No writing, no worksheets, no lesson, instead...
I say to them with a joyful sigh,
with a Tuesday twinkle in my squinty eyes,
"Hey, kids! Glad you're back!
Now read a whole lot while I relax."

I've been lame all my life. But this profession has really taken it over the top.


In other news, the index finger of life is poking me in the eyeball repeatedly. It's fine. But in order to distract myself from everything, I've been goal orienting my life. Don't confuse this with problem avoidance. Simply coping. Here is a list of goals so far. Because as we all know, blogging about lists and goals is what I do.

1. Training for the Austin Half Marathon. 2.20.11. My training schedule has been written with pen in my planner. This means I have to. Mostly because I don't want to be a loser. But also, because I'll have to scratch out everything I wrote and make my planner ugly if I cancel these plans. That's not cool.

2. Find an opportunity to wear really red lipstick.

3. Create something. This goal needs some refining. Basically, there will be something pretty that didn't exist before, because of me. Stay tuned.

4. Plan a trip.

5. Take a serious hike. Perhaps wear the brown boyscout boots that go along with this. Something wild like that.

6. Get my tattoo.

7. Redecorate my apartment.

8. Read the New York Times every day.

9. Wear something other than my TOMS and boots to work. I need variety. And these are beginning to smell. Which also means I get to shoe shop. [High-five to self.]

10. Shave my legs regularly even though it's almost winter.

11. Cook things that aren't prepackaged and microwavable. I'm tampering with vegetarianism again, P.S. Before you tell me I'm stupid, ask questions, and roll your eyes, let me just say this:
Shut up.

12. Figure out a way to get my hands on an iPad.

13. Refrain from slapping students.

14. Get addresses and write notes.

15. Decide my stance on the Beatles on iTunes thing while I wait ever-so-patiently for John Mayer's retort to Taylor Swift's "Dear John". Say something mean, d-bag. I dare you.

16. Find the humor in everything.

17. Organize car. I think I'll put things in a storage bin in the back. That way, at least it's contained crap.

18. Pay some attention to my tumblr account. Idea: document the ridiculous stuff that happens to me on a daily basis. I.e. ruining graded papers with a bottle of water, bleeding pen on pants, car turns itself off mid-turn, butt crack in the air at the top of a gigantic public slide, etc.

19. Put away the damn laundry.

20. Live.

I thought living would be a good goal to include. Anyway. That's what's up with me. I'm off to spend some time with Texas Pecan coffee, Glee, and goal work. Talk to you over the holidays, perhaps? Be blessed, friends. xoxo :)